New York Wine Diary: Day 2 – The Continuing Saga of My Friend Delicious

The wines in the photograph above are certainly delicious, the Egon Müller-Scharzhof  estate on the Saar makes some of the finest medium-sweet and sweet Rieslings on Planet Wine, however, when I pressed the shutter there was someone on the screen of my camera I was trying and failed to capture.

Delicious and I have been dating for a long time now and it feels really good, but there’s no way around the fact that we make an odd couple. You see, she’s always so phenomenally gorgeous and so unbelievably charismatic, and I’m so rough and ready however much effort I make to look good. That’s why at social events when people ask me who I am I frequently answer, “I’m with Delicious,” and gesture in her direction. Mostly guys cast an envious glance at her, then give me a look that says, “you lucky guy!” Sometimes though I can tell that what people are actually thinking is,  “how come that awesome beauty picked you when should could have had any guy in town?”

What exactly does she look like? That’s the strangest thing about her. You see she looks really different at each of our dates, but people always recognize her and get really excited, as if they were meeting some huge celebrity. So a lot of people are taking photos of her and selfies with her, but however good the image on the cellphone or camera screen looks when they press the shutter Delicious is never there in the finished photo, only an odd empty space where she was standing. For some reason people just shrug their shoulders and don’t mind that at all, indeed, they just seemed overwhelmed to have met her.

Perhaps that has to do with the fact that wherever she goes and whatever she does her presence makes everybody feel good. People stop dead in their tracks in front of pictures on the wall or vases of flowers totally captivated by them. They take a sip of their coffee, their glass of water, their cocktail or their wine and they swoon.  Or they start jigging rhythmically to the music that’s playing because, try as they might, they can’t keep their feet still. Many of them don’t hesitate to dance, even if there’s nothing resembling a dance floor, and it doesn’t stop there. Whenever I leave the room I see or hear couples making out in whatever halfway inconspicuous corner they can find. I can’t begin to explain how it works, but this is the effect she has wherever she goes. It feels good!

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